How to Interview Your Parents: A Step-by-Step Guide

Your parents carry decades of stories in their heads. Tales of how they grew up. How they met. What shaped them. But those stories won't tell themselves. Someone has to ask the right questions. Someone has to press record.

That someone can be you. And it's easier than you think.

This guide walks you through how to interview your parents—from prep to recording to what comes after. By the end, you'll have everything you need to capture stories your family will treasure for years.

Article Snapshot

Start with prep: choose the right time, place, and mindset
Video captures more than audio—expressions, gestures, personality
Simple phone setups work; you don't need fancy gear
Organize questions by life stage: childhood, career, love, wisdom
Listen more than you talk; let silence do its work
Back up recordings right away; organize and share with family

Why Recording Your Parents' Stories Matters

The average person dies with 70+ years of stories no one ever asked about. Think about that. Decades of memories, lessons, and wisdom—gone because no one thought to capture them.

Your parents lived through events you only read about. They made choices that shaped your family. They learned hard lessons you could benefit from. But unless someone records those stories, they fade away.

Here's the hard truth: health changes happen fast. Memory fades. Time runs out. The best moment to start is now. Not next month. Not next year. Now.

The stories you capture today become gifts for kids not yet born. They become a window into your family's past. They become a way for future folks to know the people who came before them.

How to Prepare for a Parent Interview

Good interviews don't happen by accident. A little prep goes a long way toward getting great stories out of your parents.

Choose the Right Time and Place

Pick a time when your parent is relaxed and alert. Avoid holidays when things are hectic. Skip times right after meals when energy dips. Morning often works best for older folks.

Find a quiet spot. Turn off the TV. Silence phones. Background noise ruins recordings and breaks focus. A living room, kitchen table, or porch works fine.

Don't rush. Set aside at least an hour. Let your parent know there's no time pressure. Some of the best stories come after they've been talking for 30 minutes and finally relax.

Gather Background Info First

Dig out old photos before you start. Photos trigger memories better than questions alone. Let your parent hold them and tell you what they see.

Talk to other family members. Ask what topics you should cover. Find out about events or people you might not know about. This helps you ask smarter questions.

Write down what you already know about your family history. This helps you avoid covering ground you don't need and spend more time on new stories.

Set Clear Expectations

Tell your parent what you're doing and why. Say something like: "I want to record some of your stories so the kids can hear them someday."

Let them know they can skip any question. Some topics might be hard. Give them permission to pass. They'll share more if they feel in control.

Explain how you'll use the recordings. Will you share with family? Keep them private? Knowing this helps your parent open up.

Recording Equipment for Family Interviews

You don't need fancy gear to capture great stories. But a few simple choices make a big difference in quality.

Video vs. Audio: Which Is Better?

Video wins every time. Here's why: audio captures words, but video captures the person. Their face when they talk about meeting your mom. Their hands as they describe their childhood home. Their laugh. Their tears. These moments matter.

Future family won't just hear stories—they'll see the storyteller. That's powerful. It's the closest they'll get to knowing your parent in person.

Audio works if video makes your parent too nervous. Some people clam up in front of cameras. But try video first. Most folks forget the camera is there after five minutes.

Simple Setup Options

Smartphone on tripod (budget): Your phone shoots better video than cameras from 10 years ago. Get a $20 tripod to keep it steady. Set it at eye level so it feels like a normal talk.

Laptop or webcam (easy remote): If you live far away, video calls work. Zoom, FaceTime, or Google Meet all let you record. Quality isn't perfect, but it beats not recording at all.

Dedicated camera (best quality): A DSLR or mirrorless camera gives you the best image. But only go this route if you know how to use one. Fumbling with gear breaks the flow.

Audio Tips

A quiet room matters more than an expensive mic. Turn off fans, AC, and anything that hums. Close windows if there's traffic noise.

Test your recording before you start. Do a quick 30-second clip and play it back. Make sure voices are clear and loud enough.

For phones, an external lapel mic ($15-30) improves sound quality a lot. Clip it to your parent's shirt, close to their mouth.

Lighting Basics

Natural light from a window looks best. Face your parent toward the window so light falls on their face. Avoid having the window behind them—that creates silhouettes.

If natural light isn't an option, a simple lamp in front of them works. Avoid harsh overhead lights; they create unflattering shadows.

The Questions: What to Ask Your Parents

Good questions drive good interviews. Here are questions organized by topic, pulled from Telloom's database of 600+ prompts used by professional interviewers.

Childhood and Early Years

Start here. Childhood questions are easy to answer and help your parent warm up.

What is your fondest childhood memory?
Describe the home where you grew up.
What was your hometown like?
What was a typical day like as a kid?
Who was your best friend growing up?
What did you get in trouble for as a kid?
What's your earliest memory?
Who was your childhood hero?

Career and Work Life

Work shaped much of your parent's adult life. These questions uncover that story.

What was your first job? What did it teach you? How much did you make?
How did you choose your career?
What made you successful at work?
What achievements are you most proud of?
What advice would you give someone starting out in your field?
How did you balance work and family?

Love and Relationships

These questions reveal the romantic side of your parent's life—often with sweet or funny stories.

How did you meet your spouse, and what attracted you to them?
Can you share a story from early in your relationship?
What has been the key to a strong marriage?
What advice would you give to newlyweds?
What challenges did you face together, and how did you get through them?

Values and Life Lessons

These deeper questions invite your parent to share wisdom they've gathered over a lifetime.

What values do you hope to pass on?
What lesson do you want to share with the next generation?
What's your biggest piece of advice for young people?
How do you want to be remembered?
What are you most proud of in life?

Historical Events

Connect your parent's personal story to the bigger picture of history.

What historical events affected you the most?
What's the first major news story you remember?
What technology change impacted your life most?

For more questions organized by topic, see our guides to questions to ask your mom and questions to ask your dad.

Interview Techniques That Work

How you ask matters as much as what you ask. These techniques help you get better stories.

Ask Open-Ended Questions

Questions that start with "Tell me about..." or "What was it like when..." invite stories. Questions that start with "Did you..." invite yes/no answers. Guess which ones give you better content.

Bad: "Did you like your first job?"

Good: "Tell me about your first job. What did you do there?"

When your parent gives a short answer, follow up with: "What was that like?" or "How did that feel?" These prompts pull out more detail.

Listen More Than You Talk

This interview is about them, not you. Resist the urge to share your own stories. Resist the urge to interrupt. Just listen.

Nod. Say "mmm-hmm." Make eye contact. These small signals show you're engaged without breaking their flow.

Save your own thoughts for later. The goal is to capture their voice, not yours.

Let Silence Do Its Work

When your parent pauses, wait. Don't jump in right away. Silence feels awkward, but it works. Often the best stuff comes after a pause, when they dig deeper into memory.

Count to five in your head before asking the next question. Give them space to add more.

Follow the Thread

If your parent goes off on a tangent, let them. Tangents often lead to the best stories. You can always come back to your list later.

Pay attention to what lights them up. If they get excited about a topic, stay there. Dig deeper. Ask follow-ups. The energy tells you where the good stuff is.

Handle Emotions with Care

Some topics bring tears. That's okay. Don't rush past emotional moments. These are often the most meaningful parts of the interview.

Offer a tissue. Give them time. Say something like: "Take your time. There's no rush." Then wait.

Don't try to fix their feelings. Just witness them. This is part of the gift you're giving—space to feel and share.

What to Do After the Interview

The recording is just the start. What you do next determines whether these stories last.

Back Up Your Files Right Away

Hard drives fail. Phones get lost. Cloud services sometimes lose data. Save your recordings to at least two places. Three is better.

Copy to your computer. Upload to cloud storage (Google Drive, Dropbox, iCloud). Consider an external hard drive as a third backup.

Don't edit the originals. Keep them untouched. Make copies if you want to cut or edit.

Organize and Label

Name files clearly. Include the date, your parent's name, and the main topic. Example: "2024-11-25_Mom_Childhood_Stories.mp4"

Create a simple document listing what's in each recording. Note timestamps for key stories. This makes it easy to find things later.

Write down any follow-up questions while they're fresh. You'll want to go back for more.

Share With Family

Send clips to siblings, aunts, uncles, and cousins. These stories belong to everyone. A shared drive or private link works well.

Consider a family viewing. Gather folks to watch together. This sparks more stories and creates new memories.

Inspire others to record their own interviews. The more family members who capture stories, the richer your archive becomes.

When to Get Professional Help

DIY interviews work great for many families. But sometimes you need more.

Parent is camera-shy: Some folks freeze in front of family with a camera. A trained stranger can feel less pressure.

You want guided conversations: Professionals know how to draw out stories. They've done hundreds of interviews and know what works.

You live far away: Remote interview services can record your parent in studio quality without you being there.

You want professional quality: Better cameras, lights, and audio make a difference. The recordings look and sound like documentaries.

Telloom offers guided video interviews with trained interviewers and studio-quality gear. We've helped hundreds of families preserve exactly these kinds of stories. Our interviewers use 600+ prompts across 50 categories to draw out stories you'd never think to ask about.

Start Today

You don't need perfect conditions. You don't need hours of time. You just need to start.

Pick one question from this guide. Ask it the next time you see your parent. Record their answer on your phone. That's it.

One conversation leads to another. Before you know it, you'll have hours of stories. Stories your kids and grandkids will treasure. Stories that would have been lost if you hadn't pressed record.

The best time to start was five years ago. The second best time is now.

Ready for studio-quality recordings of your parents' stories? Schedule a free planning call with Telloom to see how we can help preserve their voice, wisdom, and personality for your whole family.